News

EMBARGOED FOR RELEASE ON MARCH 17, 2025   Announcing the Release of “YTF” Flannery pays tribute to Canada’s mental health system Glastonbury, Conn. | March 17, 2025 – In defiance of Home Box Office, Inc., Jim Flannery released his long-awaited HBO special, “YTF,” on his own website this morning.  When asked for a quote about…

EMBARGOED FOR RELEASE ON MARCH 15, 2025   “Stop the Shock” Protest at Hartford’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade flim jannery returns as a clown to protest his own birthday celebration   HARTFORD, Conn. | March 15, 2025 – Today marks Hartford’s annual celebration of Saint Patrick, famously known for his voice-hearing abilities that aided him…

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE   This just in – watch this shit or die “Beige” premieres today on Fox HARTFORD, Conn. | February 22, 2023 –  “What’s up” to all my telepathic niggas out there.  This here be this reporter dropping some bomb shit on ya’ll from Jim Flannery’s website.  Since his sorry ass is extinct…

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE   Flannery says “I love you 2” An Early Valentine’s Day Gift for Gary Gulman and HBO New York, Ny | February 7, 2025 – Amidst a growing mystery surrounding the recent whereabouts of comedian Jim Flannery following his failed bid for President of these United States in the November 2024 election,…

EMBARGOED FOR RELEASE ON AUGUST 30, 2023   The Fifth Branch Exposed Revelations About Telepathy Hiding in Plum Sight Washington, D.C. | August 30, 2023 – A witch, a dead man, and a pervert defied all known laws of both modern and classical physics to transcribe a narrative about human telepathic communication, revealing that which…

In the wake of my dead husband’s unnecessary murder at Connecticut Valley Hospital this past weekend, it’s time to share what Jim Flannery was unwilling to – as if anyone ever believed he was holding back. The truth is that Jim was telepathic. Now for the risky statement for me to make as a living…

  In the spirit of the 7-7-7 season and “safe but never careful,” we’re providing both filings (including their respective cover letters) detailing multiple processes for allowing homo sapiens to communicate not just with one leprechaun but with multiple leprechauns (indeed!). Letter to Commissioner Hirshfeld (Nov, 2020) Letter to Commissioner Udupa (July, 2023) As for…

Even your favorite candidate for President of these United States cannot decide which of these is more urgent and important to share with you on our most beloved holiday of the decade so you’ll have to trust in the spirit of a coin toss and first either: view a microscope image obtained of Our Lord…

You’re just a fucking idiot. Let’s proceed. If you were led to believe that July 7, 2023 (or 7/7/2023) was your lucky day just because the sum of the digits of the year add up to 7, then I’m glad to inform you that you were incorrect in your assertions about luck and/or numerology. As…

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE   Fresh as Fuck – A Double Dose of Jim Flannery Two albums released as Flannery’s U.S. Presidency gains traction   Ottawa, Ont. | June 11, 2023 – United States Presidential candidate and psychiatric refugee Jim Flannery rewarded patient Canadian listeners with his first releases since entering the country.  The two albi…