Toronto, Ont. | June 11, 2023 – American psychiatric refugee and candidate for U.S. President Jim Flannery arrived to the final round of the Canadian Open in Etobicoke this morning to witness history-in-the-making, eyes set on the competitors in fifth, seventh, ninth, and twelfth place.  With Flannery(s) resources dwindling and a series of recent fundraising flops amidst the release of two disappointing albi just earlier today, his four-way parlay wager on this afternoon’s finish appeared…

June 9, 2023 | Washington, D.C. – United States Presidential candidate, James Flannery, added his name to three more states’ ballots for the 2024 General Election today, including Connecticut, Massachusetts, and California.  Impossibly, Flannery hand-delivered the petitions to all three states simultaneously, confirming that Flannery technically does or does not probably understand quantum mechanics as much as he understands this day is ultimately a failure since one of the clowns dropped the pizza resulting in…

Hartford, Conn. | June 9, 2023 – While spectators at the Canadian Open continued to await the arrival of American psychiatric refugee and candidate for President of these United States, James Flannery, he instead headed south, risked crossing the U.S. – Canadian border, and made his way down to Connecticut for a personal visit to hand-deliver a bouquet of flowers to his biggest fan, executive editor of the Hartford Courant, Helen Bennett. Tragically, Flannery slipped…

Montréal, Québ. | June 7, 2023 – American psychiatric refugee and candidate for the U.S. Presidency, Jim Flannery, manipulated reason and rationality once again by opening a donation-based glory hole on St. Catherine Street in downtown Montréal despite being pursued by Québec provincial authorities for questioning related to the sale of a gambling voucher involving Flannery winning the 2024 U.S. Presidential Election to Canadian astronaut, Guy Laliberté.  While it’s still early in the day, one…

Québec City, Québ. | June 7, 2023 – American psychiatric refugee James Flannery fled Québec City early this morning to avoid questioning from authorities related to the alleged sale of a betting voucher involving Flannery winning the 2024 U.S. Presidential Election to Canadian billionaire and cosmonaut, Guy Laliberté, at an undisclosed purchase price. While rumors have circulated since early this year that a betting slip Flannery did or did not obtain from a Connecticut casino…