FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Flannery Lands on the Oklahoma Ballot
Seven lucky electors to serve their civic opportunity
Oklahoma City, OK | March 17, 2023 — Staff members at the State Capitol were startled to discover a sealed envelope today containing sufficient funds to cover the requisite fees for an individual of any caliber to be placed on the 2024 General Election ballot, as well as the names of the seven electors, reportedly also named James Flannery.
Oklahoma state law requires an individual petitioning to be placed on the ballot as an Independent candidate for President of these United States to provide either (i) $35,000 and the personal information of seven Electors who may or may not have $35,000 to scrape together between them or (ii) petition for signatures from at least as many people as voted in the last General Election for Governor – 35,592 in the most recent Gubernatorial Election. Honorably, any political party of any name is allowed to print their preference for $5,000.
When asked for comment, Presidential [candidate] Jim Flannery(s) stated, “someone please tell me, who is this James nigga,” before expressing disorganized thoughts revolving around his frustrations upon finding out he was required by law to be listed as “James” instead of “Jim,” not mentioning at all that people are far more confused about what his last name actually is.
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